Why Coping Skills (and Just Talking) Aren’t Enough Long-Term: How EMDR and Somatic Based Practices Work

Coping Skills Can Help in the Moment — But They Aren’t the Same as Healing

Coping skills are often the first tools we’re given when we’re struggling with anxiety or the effects of trauma. And they are important. Coping skills help us get through the moment. They reduce overwhelm, offer relief, and help us feel more stable when things feel intense.

But coping skills are not the same as healing.

Think of coping skills like a bandage. They help manage the fire so you’re not getting burned—but they don’t always address what’s fueling the fire underneath.

Why Talking About It Doesn’t Always Change How It Feels in Your Body

If you’ve experienced anxiety or trauma, you may have noticed something frustrating: even after talking about it—sometimes for years—you still feel it in your body. The tight chest. The shallow breath. The knot in your stomach. The sudden urge to shut down or stay on high alert.

Talking about your experiences can be incredibly valuable. It helps you make meaning of what happened, name it, and gain insight. That matters.

But insight alone doesn’t always resolve what the body is holding.

Trauma Lives in the Nervous System, Not Just the Mind

Trauma and chronic stress live in the nervous system, not just in our thoughts. So even when your mind understands what happened, your body may still be carrying the charge.

This is why you can know you’re safe now, yet still react as if the threat is happening in the present. The nervous system hasn’t had the opportunity to fully process and release what occurred.

What Coping Skills Actually Do (and What They Don’t)

When we add coping skills—breathwork, grounding exercises, journaling, or art—we often get better at managing symptoms. These tools can be supportive and regulating in the moment. They help you feel more resourced and give you something to lean on when emotions spike.

These skills matter. They are not wrong or ineffective.

And yet, for many people, the symptoms return.

Why Symptoms Often Come Back

If the nervous system never fully processes the experience, it stays on alert. Coping skills can soothe the surface, but the underlying activation remains.

This can lead people to feel discouraged or blame themselves—wondering why they’re still struggling after years of therapy, insight, and effort.

How EMDR and Somatic-Based Therapies Address the Root

This is where EMDR and somatic-based therapies come in.

These approaches don’t just talk about the memory. They work directly with the nervous system to help it complete responses that were interrupted or overwhelmed at the time of the experience.

Rather than analyzing what happened, the focus is on how the body stored it—and how it can finally release it.

Helping the Nervous System Finish What Was Interrupted

Through EMDR and somatic work, the body is able to process what’s been held in survival mode. The nervous system learns that the danger has passed.

Over time, this often leads to a deeper sense of relief—not just symptom management, but real resolution.

Feeling Stuck Doesn’t Mean You’re “Bad at Therapy”

If you’ve done “all the right things,” talked about it, learned the coping skills, and still feel stuck—this is not a failure on your part.

It doesn’t mean you’re not trying hard enough. It means your body may need a different kind of support.

When It Might Be Time to Try a Different Approach

If this resonates, consider this an invitation—not to try harder, but to try something different. Healing doesn’t come from forcing yourself to cope better. It comes from helping your nervous system feel safe enough to let go.